So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
