OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I licked your asshole in confidence.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
