giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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