hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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