i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
