Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Less talking, more tequila
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize