how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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