i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
