Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize