Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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