I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
