Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize