So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
