Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
