ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize