We're facebook friends in real life
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
They are going to name an STD after you.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
