YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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