i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
