Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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