i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
