I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
