It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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