Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
