how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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