First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
