They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize