How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
