It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize