last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
