And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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