Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
