My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
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