I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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