he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
