ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
