you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
