i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
this boner is exhausting
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Randomize
