I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
