Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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