I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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