We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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