Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
