So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
