i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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