what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
