no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
