That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
