does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
This gyro tastes like lonliness
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
