god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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