she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
her facebook's as public as her vagina
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I just want to make out with him forever
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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