I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Randomize
