She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize